Bandiversary

Today is my 1 year bandiversary. What a year it has been. I had been looking forward to making this post and reflecting on my weight loss and all that it had done for me, including allowing me to get pregnant again. Now, the impact of my weight loss has been dwarfed by a much larger loss.

My life has changed completely in this last year. I’ve lost and I’ve gained. I lost 100 lbs and I gained my health, my life, confidence, and strength. The weight loss did help me to get pregnant again. I gained another member of our family, a precious daughter who will be loved and remembered forever. I only had her for 20 weeks in my womb and two hours in my arms, but I feel so blessed to have had that time at all. If someone had told me a year ago where I would be today, I wouldn’t change any of it (unless I could somehow change the outcome). In the words of Garth Brooks, “I could’ve missed the pain, but I’d have had to miss the dance.”

One thing I’ve learned is that losing weight doesn’t bring instant happiness. It has improved my life a lot, definitely. But I used to think that if I lost the weight, everything would be ok and that was the one thing that made me so unhappy. Now I realize that life is what we make it, no matter what size we are.

A year ago, I:
weighed 350 lbs
wore size 30 jeans
wore size 5x tops
had very severe sleep apnea
had high blood pressure
had severe PCOS
had a resting heart rate around 100

Today, I:
weigh 250 lbs
wear size 18 jeans
wear size 1x-2x tops
have minimal sleep apnea and I’m no longer dependant on my CPAP
have normal blood pressure, even while pregnant
got pregnant on my own
have a resting heart rate around 70

I’m going to take new pictures soon. I have an appointment with my surgeon Dr. M this week and hopefully will get a fill next week. He doesn’t know what happened yet, so I’m really not looking forward to that appointment.